Sunday, February 14, 2010

Hi Mom, I Love You

I had two calls today.

I used to cringe when the phone rang, because I was afraid it might be my daughter in some sort of distress.

Then I started going to Al-Anon, and everyone adjusted to the new normal. My daughter stopped calling me every time something was wrong. She could count on me to listen, but not to offer a solution. Then, mostly, she stopped calling.

She called this Christmas for the first time in years. Al-Anon is teaching me not to have expectations, but to enjoy each gift as it arrives. This was a gift for which I was truly grateful.

Today, my first call was from a sponsee, who is going through a divorce. Being Valentine's Day, I thought she might need some encouragement. But she had finished her step 1 reading assignment and was just calling to find out what to do next.

The phone rang again a few hours later. I thought it might be sponsee #2. Then I saw the area code and my heart did a little jig.

It was my daughter, who had to borrow a phone to call me. She just called to say Happy Valentine's Day and to thank me for the card I sent to the only address I have for her. She hadn't picked it up yet, but she heard it was there.

I had two thoughts, almost simultaneously.

1. My daughter called me just to say 'I love you.' (Yay!!!!)
2. When I saw the number, my heart was glad, not fearful. (YAY!!!!)

My heart is overflowing. I hope yours is, too.

Happy Valentine's Day!



  1. Oh, Kathy, I get it. Today at church, my son reached over, and without warning gave me this bear hug. It was his way of saying "thanks, mom, you go above and beyond to let me know you love me unconditionally". But he could never put it into words.
    I'm happy you heard from your daughter. We just want to know they are OK.

  2. that is really wonderful, kathy~ i'm so happy for you that you're having such a wonderful day and that you got to hear from your daughter in a loving way and that you felt so good about hearing from her~

    happy valentine's day definitely!

  3. Nice Kathy.. very nice.. !!!! I'm so happy for you..

    They say to have An Attitude of Gratitude.. :)

  4. There are many of us who totally understand the twisted journey to celebrating #1 and #2. To get from where you were to where you are is awesome.

  5. Two major giant hoorays in one day. Pretty good.
    Very happy for the call and also for your response.

  6. I am glad you heard from her. I really do get it. It is awesome that you felt joy and not fear before you talked to her. Go girl!

  7. I love those moments where I'm faced with a situation that I know used to bring fear and anxiety, and I'm able to see how different things are in my life with recovery. Thanks for sharing.

  8. How wonderful, Kathy, my heart soars for you, too. Our children are a blessing... I'm glad you got to touch base with yours and I hope it happens more... and I'm glad you have manage to get rid of some of the resentments.

  9. Very happy news :) I hope the phone rings more often for all the right reasons!